Something has happened!

Nothing has really happened in the games world for ages. While the real world gets the deaths of a great actor and the former president of Pakistan, and the entire world’s financial markets crashing*, the games world has had Street Fighter released on the Virtual Console for the third time and Sega doing a pun. But now something has happened! Woo.

It’s all down to Mass Effect and our dear friends at Fox News**. They put out a report condemning Mass Effect for full digital nudity (it has one side boob. For thirty seconds. Which you may not even see during the game) and for you being able to control the copulation (which you can’t, it’s a cutscene).

Of course they had experts on both sides. The pro-game expert they then shut up so the anti-game people could have the last words. Last words that included, “I’m not going to let this game into my house,” and, “No one could argue that Luke Skywalker meets Debbie Does Dallas is a good thing.” Another roundtable member went on to say that even though the game is rated Mature, kids will still play their parents’ video games. Despite a statement from Microsoft being read out earlier that said they have tools to stop that kind of thing.

The video’s here.

Jeff Brown, the vice-president of communications at EA was having none of it. He sent a letter listing corrections to Fox. He also questioned their “experts”. Let’s have a quote.

“They have had zero experience with Mass Effect and are largely ignorant about videogames, the people who play them, and the ESRB system that governs their ratings and sales.”

“The resulting coverage was insulting to the men and women who spent years creating a game which is acclaimed by critics for its high creative standards. As video games continue to take audiences away from television, we expect to see more TV news stories warning parents about the corrupting influence of interactive entertainment. But this represents a new level of recklessness.”

“Do you watch the Fox Network? Do you watch Family Guy? Have you ever seen The OC? Do you think the sexual situations in Mass Effect are any more graphic than scenes routinely aired on those shows? Do you honestly believe that young people have more exposure to Mass Effect than to those prime time shows?”

Fox News, for their part, refused to issue a retraction, but invited EA to appear on a panel, which I’m sure will completely fair and balanced. SARCASM!

* I assume this is because the world realised that our entire wealth and prosperity was tied to a few people in the city randomly guessing.

** Redefining the word friends, there. To mean neo-con cunts.