Won’t somebody think of the children?

Actually, sod stupid kids – we feel sorry for the developers who had to work on Jamster Allstars. Why? Because all the characters are from those fucking annoying ringtones, brought to us by the company behind the similarly fucking annoying Crazy Frog. Didn’t all this guff blow over about a year ago anyway?

Unlike the Crazy Frog games, this one is a platformer, the plot involving collecting musical notes so the four playable characters can make new tunes. Nessie can breathe fire, Jambo the elephant can create shock waves and something, something and something.

It’s out on PlayStation 2 and PC for the sum of fifteen pounds, which is probably around the same price as one of Jamster’s ring-tones.

Matt Gander

Matt is Games Asylum's most prolific writer, having produced a non-stop stream of articles since 2001. A retro collector and bargain hunter, his knowledge has been found in the pages of tree-based publication Retro Gamer.

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