Do you remember 2006?
“Of course I do.”
Ah, but do you? Do you really? Science has determined that there is only one way to find out: by taking our needlessly cynical end of year quiz.
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Microsoft charmingly ignored the original Xbox entirely in 2006. This left the Xbox 360 with:
- A lot to answer for.
- Remarkable and original entertainment achievements such as Gears of War.
- Absolutely all of the predictable, generic shit Microsoft had in development specifically for American teenagers and nobody else.
- Option c, plus Viva Piñata.
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Sony forgot to do something in 2006. But what?
- Put together a stellar launch line-up for the PlayStation 3 to convince people that their vision of the next-generation is even slightly different from the last.
- Release the PlayStation 3 in Europe.
- Make people not hate them through thoughtful, subtle, intelligent marketing.
- All of the above.
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Wii is a funny name, isn’t it? But what launch titles were there for Nintendo’s latest console?
- A diverse selection of first and third party titles which banished any worries that publishers other than Nintendo will give up after six months. Again.
- A mix of genres proving that the Wii remote can definitely do more than mini-games, and token actions in proper games.
- A GameCube game, some moderately entertaining mini-games, and some rushed third party games which didn’t really work.
- Less than in America, pushing some first party titles into the new year, to make it look like Nintendo of Europe will be releasing more than two games in 2007.
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2006 was the year of the handheld. But why?
- Sony actually managed to release a worthwhile first party PSP game in LocoRoco.
- Nintendo pushed the creative envelope by releasing games based around adding up and stuff.
- There was fuck all worth playing on proper consoles.
- All of the above.
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In 2006 we lost, in decreasing order of sadness, Clover Studios, Lik-Sang and Gizmondo. But who could it be argued was to some extent responsible for the demise of all three?
- An apathetic public not interested in nice games, import games, and third-rate handhelds.
- An apathetic public afraid to demonstrate on the streets for what they believe in.
- The little baby Jesus.
- It’s always Sony’s fault.