A few months ago Oxygen were being hush-hush over what King of Clubs entails, claiming it to be “this summer’s most unusual game”. Going by name alone, The Official PlayStation 2 Magazine assumed it was a nightclub management sim and even wrote a news story reflecting that. That couldn’t be further from the truth: it’s actually a crazy golf sim with “puzzle” elements.

Like Empire’s Big Mutha Truckers, King of Clubs features satire inspired by American’s ‘trailer park trash’ and ‘hick’ society, with the game’s front man Big Bubba King – an overweight Elvis impersonator. Oxygen released a spoof interview with Bubba in a vain attempt to create a bit of mystery around it prior to being fully unveiled.

Make your own mind up on this one: “It’s a real darn’ tootin’ thang I tell ya – them there players kin git ‘emselves all kinda groovy stuff by playin’ alla mah games. There’s a shedload ta choose from an’ a ton o’ ways ta complete ‘em too. But ah should warn ya – that King Putt over near them big tranglier things…he kin be a real Bastet, so ya may wanna watch out fer him!”

Quite. Shall we move on? Going by the demo it’s hard to tell where the actual puzzle elements are, hence the quotes in the first paragraph. From what we’ve played it just appears to be that some of the holes are maze-like in design, which is a pretty stupid premise for a sport where every swing is crucial to winning. Over 95 holes feature, which is a fairly impressive number, and each is themed – space, pirate, tribal, medieval, etc – and full of intentionally tacky objects like UFOs hanging on string and cardboard cut-out backdrops. The fact that there are dozens of moving platforms and blocks popping up out of the ground makes it hard to get a hole in one, although we’re sure that if lady luck is on your side then it’s not impossible.

The power bar for your swing is located at the bottom of the screen and works in the usual manner – press the button once to choose the power, then again to swing. The character models look pretty good but the presentation is currently really bland, something that the lack of speech samples doesn’t help. You can buy new clubs and other equipment though, and on the menu there appears to be an unlockable mini-game called Gopher Hunt, which probably involves hunting gophers. But don’t quote us on that.

It’ll be swinging its way to PC, PlayStation 2 and Wii in late August, with DS and PSP versions due later in the year.

Well, sort of. The new Argos catalogue has a couple of bizarre online game gizmos that are interesting enough to warrant an article on these hallowed pages. In our day the nearest we got to playing online was tying two cans together with string then shouting rude words in either end.

Swypeout: Battle Racing is an online racer which you need a PC and the £19.99 card scanning peripheral to play. The idea is that by buying additional cards and swiping them you can get new parts for your vehicle. See what they’ve done there? The experience has been made with kids – and overly cautious parents – in mind, with a chat system featuring pre-scripted text, like Nintendo include in their online DS games.

Net Jet Game System is another that requires a PC. This one takes the form of a USB joypad into which cartridge-like keys can be inserted. These then unlock games that can be played online like Marble Blast XP and Super Soaker Water Fight. At least the joypad itself looks cooler than this almost unofficial looking Sega plug and play pad. “Full color 8-bits game” reads the description. Well done, Argos!

Flipendo! Harry Potter has been knocked off the top spot by Pokemon Diamond. Transformers: The Game stays at #2 with Pokemon Pearl at #3, thus pushing the pubescent wizard down to #4. Nintendo Europe must be pleased: three of their brain training titles also in the top ten, as well as Wii Play.

Rugby 08 on PlayStation 2 and Transformers: Autobots on DS are the only other new entries, arriving at #22 and #38. The non-appearance of Guitar Hero: Rocks the 80s in the top 40 is a surprise, although it has managed to get in at #6 in the PlayStation 2 chart.

Apart from some other DS games – Sonic Rush, Zoo Tycoon and Hamsterz – making a re-appearance, there isn’t much going on, which is to be expected given the time of year.

Although none instantly spring to mind, I’m sure that some videogames have made their first appearance at the annual Comic-Con in the past. This year there were quite a number, which might be down to the fact that E3 was scaled down.

LEGO Indiana Jones was the biggest surprise; everybody thought that Travellers’ Tales would be hard at work on LEGO Batman and LEGO Star Wars: The Complete Saga. But whereas LEGO Batman is heading for just about every format going, Indy is only down for PlayStation 3, Xbox 360 and Wii at present. Expect a PlayStation 2 and DS version to join them though: it’s not like they will be dead by the time it’s released – Summer 2008. The trailer shows Indy dodging spear-throwing natives, running away from giant boulders and collecting spinning LEGO pieces.

After the disastrous Rise of the Imperfects, you would think that Marvel wouldn’t trust EA with their characters. Not so: they’re working on a currently untitled Marvel brawler. The good news is that developers EA Chicago – them behind the pretty good Def Jam: Icon and Fight Night games – are working on it. All we know is that it’ll feature both heroes and villains and include large environments. It’s on its way to PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360.

When Ubisoft first announced a game based on Lost – back in May 2006 – they said it would appear on handhelds in addition to PC. Looks like now it will only be out on PlayStation 3, Xbox 360 and PC. Rather than playing as any of the cast, you’re placed in the sand-filled boots of a random survivor of the plane crash. There are puzzles to solve, the smoke monster to encounter, caves to explore, and the cast from the show can be interacted with. The character models look spot on, although that’s what we would expect in this day and age. If the press release is to be believed you’ll eventually be able to get back home.

Sega’s Iron Man game – which will tie in with the movie – was heavily shown at the show. The demo saw the metallic hero flying around an arctic army base, catching missiles in his hands then lobbing them back where they came from. The character model is apparently the same as the one that appears in the movie, and although he looks the part, the environments looks a little bland. It’s on its way to all formats – PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Wii, DS, PlayStation 2 and PC. Have a look at the interview here. The chap gets very excited.

There’s also a new Looney Tunes platformer in development. You can see it in motion here if you’re one of the few people who still think that Taz and Daffy Duck are cool.

It wouldn’t be a surprise if Pokemon Diamond & Pearl goes on to be the best selling DS game of 2007, although it might struggle to knock Harry Potter and Transformers off their lofty perches in the chart. We reckon that Diamond will outsell Pearl though.

There’s only one other DS game out this week, and that’s Guilty Gear Dust Strikers. We reviewed the US version way back in October 2006 and weren’t very impressed, even though the developers had tried to do something new with the franchise by including four-on-four battles in multi-tiered arenas. It walked away with a poor 4 out of 10.

In addition to Rugby 08, the PlayStation 2 gets Guitar Hero: Rocks the 80s. Neversoft – who are usually associated with Tony Hawks – developed this spin-off, which includes 30 new old tracks. There’s a trailer here if you’re wanting to rock out this summer.

Next week: Ubisoft’s Surf’s Up on everything but not much else.

The tankers which bring fresh water to flooded areas are known as bowsers. Good that he can help.

Notorious ‘interactive’ cartoon thing Dragon’s Lair is being re-re-re-release on both HD-DVD and Nintendo DS later this year. The DS version will require the handheld to he held on its side, a la Brain Training, and will also feature voice recognition.

We can give you the review score now if you like.

We don’t fully understand the idea behind the magnet peripheral that comes with the newly announced Slide Adventure: Mag Kid on DS, so bear with me.

This Japanese TV advert would suggest that instead of controlling the main character – a caterpillar – you have to rub the DS over a solid surface to make it move around maze-like environments. My best guess is that certain objects either propel or attract the critter, and so some form of feedback is emitted from the device.

It’s being developed and published by Nintendo, so there’s a good chance it’ll be released outside of Japan.

Current interest level: 68.7 percent.

Transformers: The Game hasn’t been able to shove Harry Potter off the top spot of the multiformat chart, but it’s lodged in at #1 in both the PlayStation 2 and Xbox 360 charts. It would appear that Nintendo owners don’t care for colossal robots – it’s only #11 in the Wii chart and hasn’t even managed to get in the DS top 30.

Big Brain Academy on Wii has got into the top ten though, going in at #4, and Motorstorm and Resistance are back in – at #35 and #24 respectively – because of the new PlayStation 3 bundles. Over in the PlayStation 3 chart, The Darkness sits on top of the pile, with previous #1 Ninja Gaiden Sigma dropping four places.

The DS chart is looking animal-tastic this week, with no less than twelve games featuring animal husbandry of some sort. It’s officially the handheld of choice for wannabe vets.

Just when we thought that Rockstar were playing it safe on Wii with Table Tennis as their next game, they go and announce a Wii version of the controversial Bully (nee Canis Candem Edit).

The Xbox 360 will also be on the receiving end of Bully: Scholarship Edition, which is due out this winter. It’s not a new adventure for boy thug Jimmy Hopkins, but rather an expansion of the PlayStation 2 version. The press release tells us to go here for more details, but it looks like they haven’t got around to updating it yet.

It’s a bit odd they didn’t announce this at E3. And Table Tennis on Wii, for that matter.

So, Transformers: The Game. If you haven’t the time to read our review, here’s a quick rundown: it looks really nice, and smashing stuff up then lobbing it around is fun, but the mission objectives are blander than a stale cheese sandwich and the boss battles are devoid of all creativity. In the opening FMV sequence you see a battle in a construction yard involving a crane with a wrecking ball but – get this – it isn’t even in the game!

The DS version, on the other hand, is actually pretty good, with downloadable daily challenges and over 30 vehicles to scan and steal the identities of. And you can still throw trees around.

On PSP this week there’s a tardy port of Shrek the Third – all Activision’s PSP conversions are belated, oddly – while on Wii there’s the budget priced Big Brain Academy: Wii Degree, which seems alright.

Next week: Pokemon mania returns.

When the new-look Transformers models were shown off for the first time, fans moaned about Bumblebee being turned from a Volkswagen Beetle into a Chevrolet Camaro. The creators explained that it was because they didn’t want their super-realistic movie to include a bright yellow clone of Disney’s Herbie, which makes perfect sense to us. Fans would have been better off campaigning to get Soundwave in the movie, although the similarly cool Shockwave makes a guest appearance in this game as a boss, which just about makes up for Soundwave’s exclusion. If he’s not in the already announced sequel then there’s bound to be trouble. Mark our words.

First things first – we can’t deny that developers Traveller’s Tales have put effort into making it look the part. The character models are packed with detail while the transformation animations look spot on. Environments are impressively destructible – they catch fire and crumble, while wreckage litters the street ready to be picked up and become part of your arsenal. Create too much damage and citizens will start running for cover, the police will turn up, and eventually the army will be called in. You genuinely feel like you’re in control of a huge robot – the screen shakes when walking, cracks in the pavement are left in your path, and if you take a blow from a rival you don’t just fall over on the spot – you go flying through the air before crashing into a building or whatever’s in the way. It’s a shame that the camera doesn’t always cope with the carnage.

You’re able to play as either Autobot or Decepticon factions, both of which have the same ultimate goal: seek and secure the life-giving All-Spark. The Autobots start out in the suburbs, while the Decepticons begin at a military base in the desert.

Although mainly focused on destruction, the Decepticon missions show greater ingenuity and are generally more challenging due to tougher time limits. Their opening, featuring helicopter Blackout, includes a spot of airborne dog fighting, and later you get to play as Scorponok who can tunnel underground.

The Autobot missions don’t vary much from racing between checkpoints chasing Decepticons before punching them until they explode. The mission set inside the Hoover Dam is a mistake – it’s far too claustrophobic for giant robots. Another involves blowing up petrol stations to cause a diversion, which doesn’t fit in with the plot at all – the Autobots vow to protect humans, not set them on fire.

The last set of missions for the Autobots hint that the developers ran out of time – they’re just a series of boss battles where very little skill is required. In fact, most bosses can be destroyed in the same way – throw something at them to weaken their shields then simply pummel them with punches. You can shoot and block, but there are no additional moves beyond the ones you start with and there’s no encouragement to transform into vehicle mode during battles. What’s more, even though the environments are expansive, most battles take place in a small circle. Leave this area and a countdown timer appears instructing you to return or fail the mission.

If all you plan to do is whiz through the storyline then you won’t get more than five, maybe six hours of play. Return to completed areas, though, and you’ll find sub-missions and collectable bonuses including movie trailers and G1 transformer skins. Some of these bonuses can only be unlocked by throwing objects stupidly far distances or by performing power slides around corners, which is a nice touch. It’s also unlikely that you’ll unlock all the achievements on your first play, although you’ll have to be a pretty dedicated fan to want to return and unlock the more nonsensical ones like ‘Transform 500 times’ and ‘Ram 250 cars’. Dedicated? Make that idiotic.